Developer: Sand Grain Studios
Release Date: Nov. 18, 2008
System: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360, Wii, PS2
ESRB Rating: E-10+
Official Web site
In a nutshell: A strategic first-person shooter where the messy death is replaced with messy paint.
0:00 There's a National Professional Paintball League? And it has championships? And it's popular enough to have its own videogame? OK, I have to at least try this out...
0:01 Some grainy, quick-cutting video of what I assume are real NPPL tournaments. Annoying heavy metal music plays as helmeted, full-suited paintballers dive around inflatable barriers. "Is it a game or a battle?" says an on-screen message. I'm going to go ahead and say game...
0:02 "Pro Player Tips: Support your local paintball field," says the loading screen. How in the world is that a pro player tip? Or even a tip of any kind. "Suggestion" would be more accurate.
0:03 The next few minutes spent "Creating Game Data" on the hard drive. Out of thin air, apparently!
0:07 I can choose between 26 different pro paintballers, which I suppose would be impressive if anyone gave a flying leap about pro paintballers. I go with William Smith, because he reminds me of superstar actor/rapper Will Smith, who would be great in a paintball movie. Also, he has a perfect 20/20 rating in "Marker Handling," so there's that.