Friday, May 29, 2009

Night at the Museum 2: Battle for the Smithsonian

Developer: Amaze Entertainment
Publisher: Majesco
Release Date: May 5, 2009
Systems: Xbox 360 (reviewed), Wii, DS
ESRB Rating: E10+
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Is that supposed to look like Ben Stiller?

0:00 I believe I fell asleep watching the first "Night at the Museum" movie on an airplane, but I can't be sure. That's how much of an impact it made ... I don't even remember falling asleep with certainty. Still, they sent me the game, so it deserves an hour at least...

0:01 A company logo in a skeletal dinosaur's mouth turns into a moon above a church-like Smithsonian Castle. The title pops up amidst epic trumpet music and crickets chirping in the dark. "Press Start Button." I do!

0:03 The game takes its sweet time creating new game data on my hard drive. Ah, there we go. New game, please.

0:04 I never understood the difference between "Brightness" and "Gamma." Why can I adjust both in the options when they do the same thing?

0:05 "Factoid: Press Y to get a hint," says the loading screen. Sounds more like a "Pro Tip" than a "Factoid" to me. Cut to a TV set showing "New York Tonight with Sheila Burns." The guest: Ben Stiller's character, Larry Daley, who invented a glow-in-the-dark flashlight. The lumpy 3-D model looks kind of like Ben Stiller, I guess. Quick flashback to his adventures in the first movie, then Sheil mentions they're replacing the statues at the museum with holograms. Daley leaves immediately, while Sheila transitions to a segment on dental fillings made of fudge. In the cab, Daley gripes about the move to holograms. "Sure ... you lose something in the transition to digital culture," says the cabbie. The writing is surprisingly decent. I'm loving the subtle self-awareness.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Thursday, May 28, 2009

Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Summoner 2: Raidou Kuzunoha vs. King Abaddon

Developer: Atlus
Publisher: Atlus
Release Date: May 12, 2009
System: PS2
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Well this is interes... Damn ... it froze.

0:00 With a name like Shin Megami Tensei: Devil Summoner 2: Raidou Kuzunoha vs. King Abaddon, it has to be good, right?

0:01 A guy in ornamental red armor looks out over clouds. A ninja with a skull helmet flies over a town with his insect-like wings. A guy in a gray delivery-boy outfit and cape watches as someone eats a stack of buttered toast across the room. A cat knocks over the toast, causing a woman in pink to laugh. The ninja jumps across some Japanese temple rooftops and attacks the delivery boy. The guy in a red jumpsuit laughs. The soldier opens a can of Minotaurs. YOU HEARD ME ... A CAN OF MINOTAURS. Three people stand back-to-back-to-back in a triangle. Back to the Minotaur battle, where dozens of ninjas have joined the fight. The delivery boy prepares more cans of Minotaurs. And ... title! What the hell?

0:03 The delivery boy appears in a blaze of white light. "In a sacred hall where three giant pine trees are enshrined ... you hear an ominous voice echo from somewhere." So we're going with second-person exposition here? Really? Anyway, I've been trained in the means of combating darkness. Like lighting a match? A-hyuck, hyuck, hyuck.

0:05 I'm one of four great summoners of the Kuzunoha Clan. "The right to be called Raidou is yours." An elderly voice welcomes me. More flashes of white. This is my final exam. The game asks me to "shout [my] final name, so [I] may leave it behind." What a waste. I name myself "2+2 =5" because I can.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Professor Heinz Wolff's Gravity

Developer: EM Studios
Publisher: Deep Silver
Release Date: April 14, 2009
System: Wii (reviewed), Nintendo DS
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: All the fun of physics class. Seriously, I had a pretty fun physics teacher...

0:00 It's a game named after a fundamental property of physics. How could I resist?

0:01 Unsettling strings play over a creepy Mii-alike version of what I can only assume is the good doctor Wolff on the preview screen. There's also a bouncing red ball with a big G. CREEPY!

0:02 A barebones, white loading screen advances quite slowly, all things considered. "Well hello, everybody!" says the white-haired Mii-alike. "I'm Professor Heinz Wolff and I'd like to introduce you to Gravity -- a simple yet wonderfully challenging puzzle game." He goes on to describe how to use the main menu. THE MAIN MENU. If they're explaining something so basic, I don't think I'm the target audience here...

0:04 On the options screen, virtual Dr. Wolff tells me I can use this screen to "alter Gravity (the game, not the physical property. Not even I can do that.)" Heh.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Crimson Gem Saga

Developer: IRONNOS Software
Publisher: Atlus
Release Date: May 26, 2009
System: PSP
ESRB Rating: T
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Wins the coveted "Most frequent use of the word 'salutatorian' in an RPG" award.

0:00 I know next to nothing about this game, but based on the title I'm guessing it's either a match-three puzzle game or an overwrought RPG. Or both! I don't know which option scares me most.

0:01 Loading, creating a save file, more loading, some logos and then snow falling on what looks like an anime graduation ceremony. Up above, an elf with pink hair watches as a blimp flies over the town. The title appears to the strains of elegant flutes. A blonde ponytailed woman kneels before a king. A goateed man stands illuminated by lightning. Knights draw their swords. A guy with a hammer swings with abandon at some bad guys. A redheaded boy summons a fireball. A girl on horseback runs from a boulder. A fistfight in the rain. A hand reaches for a falling girl. The music stops suddenly as doves fly in front of a temple. Cut to a slowly rotating crimson gem. The title appears again! Whew!

0:04 "History had all but forgotten it ... a power from a forgotten empire that threatened the world. It was said to hold the ability to control all of creation. After a millennium, it stirs once again." Snooze! Wake me when something original happens.

0:05 "I have no choice left. This is my only option," says a regal-looking, white-bearded fellow standing before the crimson gem. "The world will be in ruins if this power falls into the wrong hands." He offers up a young child, who gets sucked into the gem in a blaze of white light. "Prologue." What the...?

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Friday, May 22, 2009

Cannon Fodder

Developer: Sensible Software
Publisher: Virgin
Release Date: March 24, 1993
System: PC
ESRB Rating: N/A
Good Old Games Web site

In a nutshell: War ... cute, pixilated hell.

0:00 A few friends recommended this as one to check out when I came in possession of a few freebie downloads from Good Old Games. The old-school action looks right up my alley.

0:01 A helicopter flies over the jungle in an overly round, stereotypically early-'90s 3-D animation. "This is Tumba, on approach to flight zone," says the pilot over the radio. They touch down in the jungle and shuffle off, to calls of "OK, go go go, move move, come on ... oh you lousy bunch of..." from the commander. The chopper flies off and crashes in the distance. Crusher, Slice, Ice, Bambi and Daisy are the pith-helmeted guys left behind. The credits play immediately ... did I win already?

0:02 The title screen pops up with retro-tastic SoundBlaster 16 synthesizer and a confusing picture of a flower. Grainy black-and-white digital pictures of the team scroll by with jokey credits: JOOLS as James Dean, STOO as Elvis, etc.

0:04 More team credits scroll by. OK, this stopped seeming cute and started seeming a little self-obsessed. "A Virgin Publication." Publication?

0:05 I click and a bunch of pixilated, Lemming-like figures walk down a hilly path. The left side of the screen is cut off, for some reason, but some monitor-level adjustment fixes that.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Thursday, May 21, 2009

TrackMania DS

Developer: Firebrand Games
Publisher: Atlus
Release Date: March 17, 2009
System: Nintendo DS
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Mini-TrackMania in a nutshell

0:00 I've probably put over 100 hours into the free PC version of this simple, technical stunt racer, primarily in the endlessly inventive online tracks. So, naturally, I'm excited about this DS version.

0:02 I'm digging the low-fidelity chiptunes on the menu screen. Let's start with some solo racing, in the "Stadium Practice" area.

0:03 The 3-D graphics on the top screen are surprisingly smooth for the DS, even with three ghost cars (which represent bronze, silver and gold-medal times). That said, everything's very blocky and not really up to the PC resolution. Still, passable. I finish in second on the extremely short, simple course because I accidentally scraped against a wall and slowed to a crawl. Still getting used to the controls...

0:05 Two more simple tracks down already. Lots of jumps, lots of going horizontal against walls. The physics are incredibly simple, but they have a good self-consistency to them.


***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Stoked

Developer: Bongfish
Publisher: Destineer
Release Date: Feb. 24, 2009
System: Xbox 360
ESRB Rating: T
Official Web site

In a nutshell: I'm not Stoked about it. Eh? See what I did there?
0:00 My long search for an SSX replacement continues.

0:01 Lots of company logos, including one for a company called "Bongfish." Anyway, the title screen features a snowboarder flying waaaay over a hazy mountain ridge. Like, miles up. He's gonna be SORE when he lands! Some funky hip-hop plays in the background.

0:02 I hit start and jump directly to a generic rider in a red jacket with a white stripe. I can customize everything, from his height to his gloves to his "tan," (not skin color ... "tan"). The customizer loses points for a distinct lack of wacky hairstyles, but gains them back with an awesome skull-shaped facemask.

0:04 The options menu has a "forecast" option, which brings up sunny or partly cloudy predictions on a small iPhone-like PDA. Well, that's nice.

0:05 I jump into "Ride Mountain" and get a shot of a helicopter flying noisily over a mountain range. "Hello and welcome to Chile! My name is Marcelo and I'll be your pilot for the ride in!" He sounds super-excited ... at least, in the parts I can hear through the ridiculously loud chopper noise. He says something about two summits, a high one to the west and a lower one east. Lots of snowboard brands pop up in the corner for no reason...

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Punch-Out!! (Wii)

Developer: Next Level Games
Publisher: Nintendo
Release Date: March 18, 2009
System: Wii
ESRB Rating: E10+
Official Web site

In a nutshell: After 15 years, Mac is back!

0:00 I loved loved LOVED the first two console Punch-Out!! games, but was underwhelmed by my 15-minute demo of this new one at GDC. It felt way too easy, and too much a carbon copy of the original game with updated graphics and bad motion controls.

0:01 I'm digging the looping bit of the remixed original theme that's playing on the preview screen. Dun ... danana... dun ... dananana!

0:02 Little Mac punches the air in a silent room bathed in soft light. The camera zooms in and gets punched to pieces. A wall of light bulbs pops into view in the background as the title appears. The awesome remixed theme has been replaced by some odd horn-filled tune.

0:03 Heh ... the Wii pointer on the menus is a little boxing glove that punches the menu options when I click the A button. Cute.

0:04 At the GDC demo, I found that punching the air with the Nunchuk and Wii Remote was more annoying than engrossing. I'm instead holding the Wii Remote alone like an NES controller. It's just simpler. Also, I'm a lazy weakling. What of it!

0:05 Let's dive into Career mode. Glass Joe is up first ... I TOLD you this was a lot like the original game.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Monday, May 18, 2009

Bionic Commando (Xbox 360)

Developer: GRIN
Publisher: Capcom
Release Date: May 19, 2009
Systems: Xbox 360 (reviewed), PS3, PC
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that swing.

0:00 I wasn't too enamored with a quick five-minute demo of an early version of this game at CES, but it's Capcom, so it gets the benefit of the doubt for the full release.

0:01 An obligatory downloadable update, some loading, and the Capcom logo appears with the familiar old-school jingle. Yay!

0:02 The title floats on a light-blue background with soft, haunting piano music. I thought this was an action game. Why's the music going all emo on me?

0:03 I choose options from the circular menus using what looks like a length of pulsating black fiber-optic cable. Is that supposed to be the bionic arm? Ew.

0:04 Difficulty Settings are "Normal," "Hard" and "Commando." I'm guessing Commando is supposed to be harder than Hard, but it's really not clear on this circular menu ... Normal is normal enough for me, anyway.

0:05 I can see which button does what on an interactive loading screen. Then we fall slowly through the cloud cover to an overhead view of "Ascension City," by the bay. Gentle strings play in the background as a nuclear weapon goes off, disabling the camera. "Let me tell you about the man I met when I was still young..." Hmmm, that sounds familiar. So bionic soldiers were heroes, but the public turned on them. "They called them dangerous, crazy, not completely human. Bionics were a public menace." One was sentenced to death. "This is where our story begins..."

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Friday, May 15, 2009

Rag Doll Kung Fu: Fists of Plastic

Developer: Tarsier Studios
Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment
Release Date: April 9, 2009
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), PC
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Super Smash Bros. meets LittleBigPlanet meets "Robot Chicken."

0:00 The mounds of hype around this indie PC release wasn't enough to get me to even try the demo, but they release a free downloadable version on PSN and I'm there. Go fig.

0:01 "Installing trophies." Really? You have to install the Trophies? What does that even mean? "Creating Save Game," OK. "Adjust Screen Size," done. "Sony Computer Entertainment Presents" ... Havok logo ... Epilepsy Warning ... come ON, I want to PLAY!

0:02 An extremely yellow title screen, with action figures in action poses. There's an Afro Samurai-looking dude, a wizened, white-haired, stereotypical kung-fu master, and a Bruce Lee-alike. Let's jump into the tutorial.

0:03 "Master Tang is a loner," says the loading screen. "The Kung Fu community respects his desire for solitude because he reeks of fish..." Heh.

0:04 Just two attack buttons -- a punch and a kick -- but I can point them in any direction with the left analog stick. A bit odd, since the stick also controls movement, but it works. I love the hilariously jerky movements of the action figure characters -- like marionettes being jerked violently about. The floaty jumping reminds me more than a little bit of Super Smash Bros.


***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Thursday, May 14, 2009

Pro Evolution Soccer 2009

Developer: Konami
Publisher: Konami
Release Date: March 17, 2009
Systems: Wii (reviewed), PS3, Xbox 360, PSP, PC, mobile
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Point and shoot

0:00 I got a quick, five-minute demo of this game at a New York PR office a few months ago. Seemed harmless enough back then, with controls that mimicked a classic NES game but graphics that looked more like a PS2 release.

0:01 The preview screen features a large arrow bouncing between targets amidst sounds of a soccer ball being kicked. Odd...

0:02 Zoom in from high above to a soccer pitch, which lights up as another huge arrow comes out from the center. Driving rock music plays as we pan across images of Euro teams posing against a starry void. Lots of lens flare and shiny backgrounds. If I knew who these teams/players were, I'm sure I'd be very impressed. Cut to a slow pan across all sorts of team logos, then zoom back out to a ball flying high above the pitch. Someone makes a big, curving corner kick before we cut to the title screen, with two long-haired hippies in soccer uniforms standing back-to-back. Pretty sharp as far as intro videos go.

0:03 I choose my Mii, my nationality and my favorite team. Man, there are a lot of teams to pick from, from national to club teams, even "classic" teams. I can't find Arsenal, the favorite of my former podcast co-host Ralph Cooper, so I end up sticking with the three-star U.S. team out of misplaced patriotism.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Peggle (iPhone)

Developer: PopCap
Publisher: PopCap
Release Date: May 12, 2009
System: iPhone/iPod Touch
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Now easier than ever to play on the toilet.

0:00 Having played through versions of Peggle on PC, Nintendo DS and Xbox Live already, I'm not expecting a lot of surprises in this one. Basically I just want to see how well the addictive peg-popping experience translates to the iPhone's touch-screen.

0:01 I turn my iPod sideways to orient the PopCap logo correctly. As the game loads, it tells me it's "Cranking Awesomeness, Summoning Zen," etc. Before I know it, we're ready to go. That was fast!

0:02 I enter my name on a Peggle Academy "Certificate of Admission" using the iPod's crappy on-screen keyboard, and Bjorn the Unicorn makes his familiar introduction: "Ten Peggle masters are ready to teach you how to get the most out of your Peggle experience, and since I'm the boss, I get to go first!" Well la dee freakin' da!

0:03 Yup ... looks a lot like the first level of Peggle, all right. If you don't know somehow, the object is to use a bouncing pinball to hit the few orange pegs amid a sea of blue pegs. Interesting ... there's a wheel along the right edge of the screen that I flick with my thumb to aim my ball cannon at the pegs. I can also aim more directly by tapping anywhere on the playfield. Makes me wonder why the wheel is there at all...

0:04 Hey, where's the background music? Everything seems oddly quiet without it. Do they want me to go into iTunes to make my own soundtrack or something?

0:05 So far, this reminds me of Peggle: Dual Shot a whole lot. The resolution is a little better than it was on the DS, but it still doesn't compare to a full-size computer monitor or TV screen. Everything's just a little grainy and the animation is just a little jumpy.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Burn Zombie Burn

Developer: doublesix
Publisher: doublesix
Release Date: March 26, 2009
System: PS3
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Smash TV meets Zombies Ate My Neighbors

0:00 I watched a demo of this game for about five minutes at the latest Game Developers Conference. Looked fun enough, but it's hard to gauge until I get my hands on that controller.

0:01 Eerie zither music gives way to a driving guitar beat on the simple title screen. In the background, sepia-toned zombies wander about a yard aimlessly.

0:02 I got a decently broad idea of the game at GDC, but I have no idea of the particulars, so let's jump into the tutorial. "Welcome to Zombie Academy! Day 1 - Basics."

0:04 A Bruce Campbell lookalike in a flaming bowling shirt appears in a virtual environment right out of "The Matrix." He teases his ridiculous pompadour and pulls out a pistol. From a mostly overhead view I get some nice responsive running by tilting the left stick. Tapping the fire button gives faster shots than just holding it down -- that's gonna get annoying. Clicking the left stick brings up pointers to nearby weapons -- nice touch.

0:06 I pick up a chainsaw and tear through 25 zombies in record time. A few of them manage to grab at me when I get close. The characters are so tiny it's hard to discern whether I'm hitting them with the chainsaw or with ME.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Monday, May 11, 2009

Battleforge

Developer: EA Phenomic
Publisher: Electronic Arts
Release Date: March 23, 2009
System: PC
ESRB Rating: T
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Warcraft + Magic: The Gathering = the most addictive substance known to man?

0:00 I was big fan of Magic: The Gathering back in grade school, so part of me has high hopes this will satisfy my long-dormant collectible card game jones. Another part of me is pessimistic that just an hour will be enough for me to really get into it.

0:10 OK, I'm not going to go into much detail on the mess of stalled downloads, frozen computers and lengthy file checks that preceded getting this game's 2.6 GB of files downloaded and working on my computer. Suffice it to say I'm docking the game 10 minutes of play for the mere annoyance. I could easily take the whole hour, because it took much longer than that overall, but I'm not that petty.

0:12 Lots of animated logos precede the title, which appears in a blaze of light and fire amid some purple smoke. EPIC!

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Friday, May 8, 2009

Shellshock 2: Blood Trails

Developer: Rebellion Developments
Publisher: Eidos
Release Date: Feb. 24, 2009
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360, PC
ESRB Rating: M

In a nutshell: War is hell ... to play.

0:00 This kind of Vietnam War shooter usually isn't my cup of tea, but I'm trying real hard to broaden my horizons here, so I figured I'd give it a rental.

0:01 The preview screen on the PlayStation 3 menu is full of ambient war sounds -- gunshots, vague screaming, bombs going off, etc. It's got me on edge already, but not really in a good way.

0:02 The music accompanying the Rebellion logo is so loud I swear it's going to break my speakers. Then a generic title screen with some red blood cells floating around in plasma in the background.

0:03 "Fall of '69, and I'm on a bird into 'Nam, drafted like the rest of these grunts. We've fucked up this war and lost so many kids and now it's my turn. Some dickwad sergeant tells me I'm important; he's given me a special assignment at the border. The border of Hell is still Hell. I ain't even been so scared." And the award for best use of the word "dickwad" in horrible game writing goes to...

0:04 Just like that, I'm thrown roughly into a first-person view of a ratty hospital. A voiceover version of my character reminisces about the war from his position in the future. "Man up, pussy, and listen to Griffin. Maybe today you'll become a man," says a guide in fatigues. Another soldier gives me 20cc of some mystery drug. My future narrator goes on about Whiteknight, which I didn't know a thing about at the time. In the background, explosions and screaming. To my left, someone writhing on a stretcher.

0:07 The one guy who survived seeing Whiteknight (who/whatever he/it is) is tied down to a bed. He's my brother, Cal, screaming, badly bloodied and wearing an eye-patch. "Don'tcha recognize him, f**ko?" says my companion. "Or don't you remember what kin smells like?" Cal breaks one of his bonds and reaches for me. "Get the tranq gun," says my companion as he runs off. Some hazy red visions, then everything goes black. Boy, they're really throwing a lot of stuff out there really quickly.


***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Wednesday, May 6, 2009

F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origin

Developer: Monolith
Publisher: Warner Bros.
Release Date: Feb. 10, 2009
System: Xbox 360 (reviewed), PS3
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Just your standard, everyday first-pers-- hold on ... what the hell was that?

0:00 I could have sworn I'd played the original F.E.A.R. for lunch at some point, but I must be confusing it with one of the other countless "dark" FPS games that seems to be infesting the market. They all run together for me at some point.

0:01 Yes, Xbox Live, let's update now, why not.

0:02 The game's suggested brightness setting makes the sample room scene seem extremely dark, but I'll go with it. I didn't design the game, so what right do I have to argue?

0:04 Quote of the moment: "Man, I could really go for an extra hot, no whip, white chocolate macchiato!" I hope this sample audio for the voice settings isn't indicative of the real dialogue.

0:05 "Full Violence" is an editable option! And it defaults to "Yes!"

0:06 Normal difficulty and away we go! "You have been diverted from an assignment to assist an SOFD-D mission in the Auburn Industrial District. Your new orders are to proceed to the private residence of Genevieve Aristide of Armacham Technology Corporation and take her into protective custody. She will instruct you where to escort her." That's a lot of big, made-up words to basically say, "Get the girl and go where she tells you."

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Hysteria Hospital: Emergency Ward

Developer: Blue Star Studio
Publisher: O Games
Release Date: June 16, 2009
System: PC (reviewed), Wii
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Diner Dash with less food and more sick people.

0:00 Usually I'd stay far, far away from what looks like a simple Diner Dash clone, but I got a preview copy in my e-mail box and I'm in the mood for something mindless this morning.

0:01 Funky muzak-style '70s synth plays on the menu screen, with a male and female nurse standing at the ready and staring at me with creepy eyes.

0:02 I enter my name and choose the male nurse character. The female looks so dejected that I didn't choose her. We're talking "slit your wrists" levels of dejected here.

0:03 "Congratulations to all the graduate nurses from the University of California," says a bullhorn addressing a bunch of robed graduates. They throw their hats in the air. Dissolve to a montage of want ads and response letters: "Need experience," "No vacancies," "We apologize." But wait! Maryville Hospital needs nurses urgently! He calls them up. "We've been looking for someone to take my place for ages," says the fat nurse at the counter. I'm hired sight unseen! I fly off to North Carolina and before I know it it's "Day 1, Level 1."

0:04 "First days on the job are always nerve racking [sic]. But if you pay attention to your patients' needs, then you'll do great!" I need to treat five patients and get 600 "Funds." "We're happy to have you on board, let's get started," says the nurse.

0:06 Patients come in and sit and wait on some plastic chairs. I drag them to the diagnostic counter first, then over to the single, "quick treatment" bed. Once I make the nurse get the chart and bring it over, the bandaging up can start. Once it's done, I clean up and take the sheets to the laundry bin. Repeat as necessary. Seems a lot like Diner Dash to me!

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Friday, May 1, 2009

Flock!

Developer: Proper Games
Publisher: Capcom
Release Date: April 8, 2009
Systems: Xbox 360 (reviewed), PS3, PC
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Go that way. No, not that way, that way. No, the other way. GRRRR!
0:00 I remember being enamored with this cute action/puzzle game during a short demo at E3 '08, but I just didn't know if it would have any staying power. We'll see, won't we?

0:01 Some loading and some file creation take up this entire first minute.

0:02 "Use your UFO to herd any animals in the level to the Motherflocker." I love any game that can be distilled into a single sentence that way. Also, "Motherflocker" is an epic win of naming.

0:03 Level 1 is named "Un-Baa-lievably Easy." I wonder if it'll be tough...

0:05 So, basically, I'm a UFO hovering a few feet off a patchwork of sewn-together grass. When I get close to the white puffball sheep, they run away scared. I have to use this reaction to herd them towards the Motherflocker mothership. The sheep are incredibly cute as they bounce up and down and away from my ship.

0:07 On to Level 2: "Hide and Seek." Here the sheep are hiding behind trees, but my ship's antenna points out the closest ones. I have to get used to making wide arcing circles around the sheep, so I don't inadvertently push them in the wrong direction while I'm trying to get in position.


***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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