Dragon Quest IX: Sentinels of the Starry Skies

Developers: Level-5, Square Enix

Publisher: Nintendo
Release Date: July 11, 2010
System: Nintendo DS
ESRB Rating: E10+

In a nutshell: Not all fallen angels are bad guys

0:00 I've never actually touched a Dragon Quest game, save for a brief, frustrating stint with the original Dragon Warrior on the NES. An hour probably won't be nearly enough to get a true feel for this epic game, but will it be enough to make me want to play more?

0:01 In an anime cut scene, a boy runs into a cavern, towards a fire-breathing dragon . A woman casts a spell. Slimes bounce on a rocky plain. Pan over a town where a boy plays with a dog. A party talks in a tavern. A woman dances. They clink glasses. A blue spirit rises up. A castle in the clouds. An eagle flies over a field. Zoom up to the starry sky and show the title! Yup, it's a Japanese RPG opening, all right. The animation reminds me of Dragon Ball Z, which is understandable, since it's by the same animator.

0:03 The character creator makes it remarkably easy to make a character that looks exactly like Super Saiyan Vegeta from Dragon Ball Z, which I do. My newly created character gets a halo and angel wings and he flies off. Then... loading? In a DS game?

0:04 "Hello? Is anybody there? If you're there, say something. Show yourself. Thus do the voices of mortals plead, ever hopeful of our existence. For how long have we watched over their realm?" Here we go with the heavy-handed religious allegory...

0:05 Pan over a idyllic little farm village, rendered in blocky, heavily-outlined 3D. Neighbors wave to each other, a horse whinnies, a man fishes in a gentle stream. Two angels watch. One of them is my Vegeta. The other, Aquila, one is impressed with how I've watched over the village, Angel Falls.

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***-->AT GAMERONI<-***

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Professor Layton and the Unwound Future

Developer: Level 5

Publisher: Nintendo
Release Date: Sept. 12, 2010
System: Nintendo DS
ESRB Rating: E-10+
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Simple puzzles, even simpler protagonists.

0:00 I liked the first Professor Layton DS game for its mix of clever puzzles and cute British charm. I put down the second game midway through, though, as the prevalence of sliding puzzles began to grate on me.

0:01 The piano and violin music on the title screen is ominous and catchy at the same time.

0:02 "This is a work of fiction," says the disclaimer. What, people were confused by this? Fade to an animated video of a bustling London street. A double decker bus trundles by. Cut to the bus interior. "It just doesn't seem to add up professor," says toe-headed Luke. "I honestly thought you were pulling my leg," Top-hatted Professor Layton replies. "What? I wouldn't dream of it." Um, what's going on?

0:03 Cut to a shadowy figure that looks like Luke, writing a letter. "Professor, I hope this letter finds you well. As for me, I'm in quite a predicament." The letter writer is from ten years in the future, when London has been thrown into turmoil. He tells the recipient to go the the clock shop. It's from "Your student, Luke Triton." Whhhaaaaa?

0:04 Layton's voice sounds a little more gravelly and less British than previous games. Maybe it's just my imagination? Anyway, Luke and Layton joke about time travelling postmen and how even future-Luke is too stupid to do anything without Layton's help. The "strange letter" gets filed in "Unsolved Mysteries." I loved that show!

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***-->AT GAMERONI<-***

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Professor Layton and the Diabolical Box

Developer: Level 5
Publisher: Nintendo
Release Date: Aug. 24, 2009
System: Nintendo DS
ESRB Rating: E-10+
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Critical thinking is STILL the key to success.

0:00 I loved working through the first Layton game, even though a few of the puzzles were a bit too obtuse. Of course, the grassroots viral promotion for this sequel has only increased my interest.

0:01 A boy and a girl stand with their backs facing each other on a woodcut. The title appears over them with elegant strings and light piano backing. "New Game" is my only option, so ... I choose it!

0:02 After writing in my name, white text appears on a black background with a gentle female narrator: "There are tales of a box that brings death upon any who dare open it. Tell me, do you think those rumors could be true?" An whimsically animated cut scene in a train station, now. "Hey look, there it is," young Luke cries.

0:03 Luke and Layton give over their tickets and walk onto the platform. A woman in a yellow headscarf follows, lowering her sunglasses to see if anyone is watching her. Workers are trying to squeeze a fat lady into a train car. On the train, Layton calls the train "a cruise ship on rails." And away they roll. Layton's voice sounds a bit different than in the last game ... slightly more menacing, slightly less carefree. Is this a new voice actor?

0:04 Luke and Layton chat about the Elysian Box. "All who open it die, eh?" asks Luke. "The answer is out there, Luke ... but we just need to find it." "We will ... I know it," says Luke, cloyingly. "Prologue: The Elysian Box." Can't say the intro has hooked me as of yet.

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Jeanne d'Arc

Developer: Level 5
Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment
Release Date: Aug. 21, 2007
Systems: PSP
ESRB Rating: T
Official Web Site

In a nutshell: The totally, absolutely, completely accurate history of Joan of Arc, told through anime and turn-based strategy. Plus: demons.

0:01 The game opens to a simple menu screen set on an ornately prepared table in a cathedral of some sort. I'm loving the orchestral music already.

0:02 Lightning rends the sky over a castle. A small boy that looks like a girl asks his uncle for a bedtime story. "I wonder if you have heard this story yet..."

0:03 A demon set his sights on the human realm, and set reapers to take it. The humans forged five magical armlets to contain the demon. Lord of the Rings much? Some beautiful anime battle scenes here. Top notch production values.

0:04 The kid's out cold. "Much time has passed and now England finds itself embroiled with France in a war that has lasted nine centuries. What an irony then that I must call on the fiends immeasurable power to ensure young Henry has a future beyond these troubled times." NO,! DON'T DO IT, YOU FOOL!

0:05 An armored knight tries to stop the sorcerer/uncle, but all he does is cut a hole in the summoning pentagram. Also: why is this guy summoning the dark powers in Henry's room? Doesn't he have a secret lair or something. "You were one of the five. How can you tolerate selling your soul to a monster like that?" "You were a dear friend once, so I will not end your life." Good voice acting here.

0:07 The soldiers' armband glows and he throws his sword at a demon that threatened to take Henry. The sorcerer insists forcefully that Henry "not be kept from his destiny." What destiny? Life as a cursed prince? "I do this all for the good of young prince Henry. Now he shall rule over this world as it's true king... for all eternity." Henry lets out a demonic laugh. I'm hooked!

0:08 Suddenly, the game switches to cel-shaded polygons and text boxes instead of voice-acted anime. The transition is pretty jarring. Phoo. Anyway, Jacques flirts with young Jeanne and Lianne at a festival. Oh, Jacques is their dad. Never mind.

0:10 Jeanne and her sis Liane get sent off to deliver an herb to the church, and find their brother in the woods while they're at it. Nothing good can come of this...

0:11 Jeanne and Liane gossip about Roger, who was awkward when he first came but now everyone loves him. No time for that, an unconscious soldier falls off a horse. More anime.

0:12 A glowing bag ensnares Jeanne and make her wrist glow. It turns into an armlet (another armlet, eh?). The horse indicates there's something in the saddlebag. It's a large purple toad? Huh?

0:13 Some sort of pig demon emerges from the woods nearby. And we're back to cel-shaded blockiness. A voice from the darkness: "YOU MUST FIGHT... TAKE THE SWORD......" See, Joan of Arc heard the voice of god. It's historically accurate! Except for the purple toad, I imagine.

0:14 Time for the first battle. You can move and then perform one action: attack, skill or item. A combat forecast appears before you attack an enemy telling you expected damage and counterattack. Don't like it? Move and try again. Very Advance Wars.

0:15 Attacking from the side seems to do more damage, so that's what I do. The damage forecasts were off by one, so it seems you don't have totally perfect information going in.

0:17 Liane's turn... she attacks with a stick and kills another one of the pig beasts. 30 G for the trouble and lots of experience.

0:19 Oh, there's one more enemy I didn't see. I make sure to keep out of his range. Luckily he walks into mine next turn.

0:21 Man, this orc is tough, but I manage to kill him without having to heal. I level up already? That was easy.

0:22 "Where did you learn to wield a sword." "I didn't... the strength came from the armlet. And that voice..." Roger was too late to help, delayed by his own demons as he was.

0:23 Back to anime briefly. The village is burning. Note to RPG characters: NEVER LEAVE THE VILLAGE! IT WILL BURN DOWN IF YOU DO!

0:24 No time to mourn for the dead villagers... there's an English soldier leading some orcs nearby. Time for battle!1

0:28 So far Rogers has missed with his first two attacks. What a worthless addition!

0:29 Roger finally connects, and it's the killing blow. "Kill them" the English soldier helpfully commands from afar. What gripping dialogue...

0:30 Mid-battle cut-scene time. The voice tells Jeanne to hold the armlet aloft to unlock its powers. And if the voice told you to jump off a bridge... would you? A Sailor Moon style anime transformation commences. Jeanne is now a super-badass knight. "This...power. Where is it all coming from." Er, the PSP battery? Super-Jeanne can move again if she kills enemies and has other special skills, but you can only transform for a few turns and once per stage.

0:33 Holy crap, Super-Jeanne does four times the damage! She's tearing across the countryside killing enemy after enemy in one massive turn! Yeehaw!

0:37 Uh oh... back to normal Jeanne. Good thing the enemy is all but defeated anyway.

0:39 Shift to the throne room of little King Henry VI. He loves loves kittens despite being possessed. That is all.

0:41 Uncle sorcerer, who's now a duke, is a little put off by the evil demon king he created. "I suppose even the weak have a role to play. Perhaps wishing painful deaths upon them might be a bit hasty," he argues. YA THINK?!

0:42 That large purple toad saunters by and agrees to come on the journey with us. It's OK, though... it's a well known historical fact that Joan of Arc consorted with large purple toads at many points throughout her life.

0:43 "I can take care of everyone if I need to. I have the armlet." Yeah, you proved that pretty well last battle.

0:44 More anime. Jeanne might be a badass warrior, but she's not above crying and cutting her hair short. "I can not lie down when they have trampled our honor." Chapter I: A Legend Begins.

0:48 The controls for the menus and world map and such are explained extremely clearly. Navigating menus is a breeze.

0:49 The world map is massive. This is gonna be a long game. My objective is to "head to Vaucouleurs," though I'm not sure why. I guess any place is better than my burnt down hometown.

0:50 In Vaucouleurs, Jeanne tries to convince Captain Robert that she hears the voice of god and should be let in the army despite being a commoner. He's not receptive, to say the least. "I don't have time to haggle with men like him," she cries and they run off to Neufchateau, where there's a battle a-brewing and no spare soldiers to fight it.

0:53 For some reason, Jeanne can't get her super armor to work in a cut scene. Good thing Bertrand and Jean run in and save the day and join our party.

0:57 Lots of new stuff introduced in this battle, including initial troop placement, power granting "burning auras" that appear when you attack, and "unified guards" that form when your party is close together. "A pact with friends is they greatest Aegis!" Wha?

1:00 I have a limited number of turns to finish this battle, but something tells me it won't be too hard... at least not yet. Also: There's an enemy named Lizardman. Someone tell Namco!

Would I play this game for more than an hour? Yes.
Why? Great interface, interesting, well-told story and strategy that shows some signs of depth.

This review based on a retail copy provided by Sony.