DJ Hero 2

Developer: FreeStyleGames

Publisher: Activision
Release Date: Oct. 19, 2010
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360, Wii
ESRB Rating: T
Official Web site

In a nutshell: A smooth remix.

0:00 I liked the original enough to buy it when it went on sale for $40 recently, but not before that. I’ve been told this sequel is much better, but I find that hard to believe -- what can they possibly add?

0:01 This being a PS3 game, of course there’s a version 1.01 update to download already. At least my firmware is somehow up to date. The 6MB file downloads and installs rather quickly.

0:02 Headphones bounce on a white floor. The headphone wire flies through a white expanse, creating colorful abstract art as it does. It plugs in to the DJ Hero 2 logo. Nice, simple and quick... I’m a fan.

0:03 A remix of "Crank That Souljah Boy" plays over the menu as the game logs in to the DJ Hero 2 server. I am not a fan. The game asks if I’ve played DJ Hero before, and also if I’d like to hear about new features in the sequel. How considerate!

0:04 The tutorial starts by telling me to spin the record to rewind the music, which I already knew how to do. I thought I told you I played DJ Hero already...

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Sonic the Hedgehog 4: Episode I

Developers: Sonic Team, Dimps

Publisher: Sega
Release Date: Oct. 12, 2010
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360, Wii, iPhone/iPod Touch
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Still Sonic after all these years...

0:00 The only 3D Sonic game I enjoyed even a little bit was the extremely underrated Sonic 3D Blast, so I'm more than happy the series is finally returning to its 2D roots after 15 years.

0:01 The music on the preview screen is annoyingly repetitive, and not even in a catchy, old-school way.

0:02 Oh man they reprised the old school "Seeegaaaaaa" introductory chant. I half expect the classic Sonic title theme to follow, but instead it's the same annoying preview screen music. Bleh.

0:03 We dive right into Splash Hill Zone, Act 1: "The Adventure Begins." I'll catch ya when I'm done.

0:06 Yup, that's some old-school Sonic all right, right down to the loops and the springboards and the constant tension between running as fast as possible and searching the massive levels for hidden paths and items. The biggest difference, right off, is the mid-air homing attack that lets me zoom right to nearby enemies. I'm used to it from the 3D games, but it just feels odd here. Even if there's nothing to home in on, I can use it to change directions in mid-air, which is probably the closest Sonic will ever get to a double jump. I’ll take it.

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Joe Danger

Developer: Hello Games

Publisher: Hello Games

Release Date: June 8, 2010

System: PlayStation 3

ESRB Rating: E

Official Web site

In a nutshell: Excitebike + Tony Hawk's Pro Skater = AWESOME!

0:00 I really liked the old-school feel of the five minute demo I played at PAX East. But what really pushed me to download this one was the passion displayed by developer Sean Murray at last week's Develop conference.

0:01 Nice cheery guitar, bass and maraca music over the preview screen as the square-jawed protagonist stands at the foot of a ramp, smiling. I'm grinning like a fool already.

0:02 A cassette tape appears in the corner of the black screen during the loading. Is this a reference to those old tape-loading systems or something? That's before my time, sadly.

0:03 "J-j-j-j-j-j-joe DANGER!" says an over-caffeinated anouncer "Folks, let me tell you about Joe Danger," says a grizzled sounding man. "He was the world's most determined stuntman. That was a long time ago, back then he was a household name ... But it all went wrong. They said he'd never walk again, but he showed 'em. Now he wants to make his comeback. Maybe YOU can help." This quick story is accompanied by old newspapers and billboards showing Joe with a '70s mustache. Cute and, more importantly, QUICK!

0:05 The menu is a sort of trailer park. I zoom in on "Stunt Weekly" and choose "Joe Danger Returns," my only option. My mission is to "Collect all the Ministars?" Um.. "all the Mobsters?" This text is nearly unreadable on my 20" standard def TV.

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Scene It? Brights Lights! Big Screen!

Developer: Screenlife

Publisher: Warner Bros.

Release Date: Nov. 17, 2009

Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360, Wii

ESRB Rating: T

Official Web site

In a nutshell: Yup... that's some movie trivia right there.

0:00 I'm in the mood for something low key this Friday morning, and it doesn't get much more low key than a movie trivia game. I'm not much of a movie buff, but I am a bit of a trivia buff, and I'm hoping those two facts will even out. I'm playing by myself, which is less than ideal, but I'm in it for the pure thrill of trivia, not to gloat over friends.

0:01 "This is Planet Scene It. Population: Movies! If you've seen it on the silver screen you can bet it happens here. Every summer blockbuster. Every epic battle. Every love story. Every hidden treasure. Every dog fight. Every... collapsing evil water park. There I am, I'm the director. I pull it all together and I'll be your host for SCENE IT? BRIGHT LIGHTS! BIG SCREEN!" This is all illustrated with some of the lowest budget 3D animation I've ever seen. Seriously, this would have looked chintzy in 1990.

0:03 There are options for "Change Audio" and "View Credits." Wow, this is quite the full-featured game.

0:04 Some cute character model options, including flim archetypes like Desperado, Swashbuckler and... Disco Girl? I go with a Sci-Fi Cadet in a skimpy green costume, 'cause she's HOT!

0:05 I change the settings to a longer five-puzzle game instead of a short three-puzzle game because I have to fill up a whole hour, right? I turn on the Classic (i.e. timed) Scoring mode and activate negative points because I am HARDCORE!

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Sony's E3 Booth in PlayStation Home

Developer: Sony

Publisher: Sony

Release Date: June 15, 2010

System: PS3

ESRB Rating: N/A

Official Web site

In a nutshell: A bold, annoyingly inconvenient new way to watch trailers.

0:00 I tried out PlayStation Home when it first launched over a year ago and found it extremely boring. But I've been feeling a bit sad that I didn't make it out to E3 this year, so when Sony announced at their press conference that they were providing a virtual show floor in PlayStation Home, I figured it was a good excuse to see if the "virtual world" experience has changed significantly since the launch. My expectations are not high.

0:01 Downloading Version 1.36 of the Home software looks like it will take only take a few minutes.

0:02 And we're all downloaded and installed... only to find that "PlayStation Home is closed for essential maintenance." I bet the real E3 booth isn't closed for essential maintenance.

0:03 Online research suggests that Home has been down since 8 a.m. local time so they can load up a new Home Square and a new Playground area. That means it's been down more than three hours now. Guess I'll pause the clock, grab a shower and a bit to eat and check back later.

0:03 1 p.m. local time and Home is still down for maintenance. Good thing I have other work to do.

0:04 I log in once more at 4:06 p.m. local time and get an "Open Beta Agreement" instead of an error message. And we're off!

0:05 Wow, the text is INCREDIBLY tiny on this non-HD CRT screen. I have to squint and lean in just to read a message introducing the E3 area. Apparently I can also gain access to a "VIP room" with "exclusive videos." All right... now I have a goal for the hour. VIP Room or bust!

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DiRT 2

Developer: Codemasters

Publisher: Codemasters

Release Date: Sept. 8, 2009

Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360, PC

ESRB Rating: T

Official Web site

In a nutshell: What dirtier than being DiRT? ICE COLD!

0:00 I liked the Xbox 360 demo for the first DiRT well enough, but not well enough to buy the game. In fact I had to look up a GfL from three years ago just to confirm that I had in fact played the original game.

0:01 I'm in England for the summer, so I'm playing my PS3 on a standard definition TV for the first time in years. On the plus side, they have widescreen SDTVs here. On the downside, everything still has what I refer to as "PS2 blur" on it.

0:03 "There is not enough free space on the hard disk. The game was forced to quit. At least 3249 MB more free space is needed." Of course.

0:04 Man, why do I still have Tom Clancy's H.A.W.X. install data on here? I haven't played that game in months. Also, why in the world did H.A.W.X. need 4,896 MB from my hard drive in the first place?

0:05 "Installing required game data. Please do not turn off the PLAYSTATION(R)3 system." Hoo boy, I hope the way-too-expensive 300 Watt British voltage converter I got holds out...

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Ratchet and Clank Future: A Crack in Time

Developer: Insomniac Games

Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment

Release Date: Oct. 27, 2009

System: PS3

ESRB Rating: E10+

Official Web site

In a nutshell: The future looks a lot like the past. And the past was awesome.

0:00 I've been a big Ratchet and Clank fan since their first outing, and my love hasn't diminished much despite yearly updates that don't bring much new to the table. I vaguely remember playing a quick demo of this at E3 2009, but not being terribly impressed with the time-based puzzles.

0:01 Gentle fantasy music plays on the preview screen. What looks like Ratchet on steroids looks out over a cliff edge with some sort of cat thing at his side? What the... where's Clank?

0:02 "The latest update data for this softare has been found." I suppose that's understandable since the game has been out for months now...

0:04 14MB file downloaded and installed. That was relatively painless.

0:05 "This game needs to perform an initial setup process." Of course it does.

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3D Dot Game Heroes

Developer: Silicon Studio

Publisher: Atlus

Release Date: May 11, 2010

System: PS3

ESRB Rating: E10+

Official Web site

In a nutshell: More Zelda than Zelda.

0:00 I like the blocky, 3D aesthetic I've seen in screenshots, and the comparisons I've been hearing to the old 2D Zelda games are encouraging.

0:01 Retro chiptune music plays as we get some diagonal overhead shots of the game's various areas: A desert, a plateau, a field filled with bushes. The "demo play" shows our hero using a hookshot to cross a river, putting up a shield to block arrows from Goblin-ish enemies, arrows being fired at leaping spiders, and a dungeon whith a skeleton battle. Besides all the characters and environs being made of small colored cubes, these shots could all have come straight from A Link to the Past.

0:06 I hop into the editor to "edit my character." Only after playing around for five minutes or so, trying to make a passable round smiley face, do I remember that I have no artistic ability.

0:07 That's OK, there's a whole lot of pre-made characters to choose from. "Striker" has a soccer ball to dibble in front of him. "FunkSanta" has the familiar red and white pallette and "a funky walk." "Galleon," is an honest-to-goodness pirate-type ship. "Poochi" is a dog. "GT Car" is... well you get the idea. The oddest, though, is "President," described as "the X7th president of the United States" who just happens to be a red and black dragon.

0:08 After all that, I go with "Pumpkin," a black spectre with a pumpkin for a head. I name him "...~%O[triangle][square]X, because I can.

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Army of Two: The 40th Day

Developer: EA Montreal
Publisher: Electronic Arts
Release Date: Jan. 12, 2010
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360, PSP
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Shanghai is exploding, but at least you're with your HARDCORE best friend...

0:00 I have no experience with the first Army of Two game. In fact, my entire impression of the game is formed by these two Penny Arcade comics, so you might say I have LESS than no experience with the first game. So I'm eager to see see what the relative lack of fuss is about.

0:01 "The latest update data for this software has been found." Really? The game just came out today and there's already a downloadable patch? It's OK ... version 1.01 should only take 75 seconds to download, according to the handy progress bar on-screen.

0:04 The patch is downloaded and installed and we're off on a magical journey. A city in flames appears in the background as the Army of Two title flies in with a metallic clang. Then immediate fade to the title in front of a blurry picture of the two skull-masked protagonists running away from an explosion. A bad Rob Zombie riff plays in the background. HARDCORE.

0:06 The background of the menu screens flickers between some grainy security camera footage of a sleepy Chinese alley, for some reason. I know this game is all about the co-op, but I don't think I know anyone who actually owns it yet, and I'm not about to play with some whiny 12-year-old brat on PSN.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Demon's Souls

Developer: From Software
Publisher: Atlus
Release Date: Oct. 7, 2009
System: PS3
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: I spent nearly half of the hour dead.

0:00 I was pretty unimpressed with a live Internet video demo of this game a few months ago -- it just looked like any other dungeon hack-and-slasher. But then the game came out and all sorts of critics started praising it for its design and punishing-but-fair difficulty, so I figured I had to see what all the fuss was about.

0:01 "On the first day man was granted a soul, and with it, clarity. On the second day upon Earth was planted an irrevocable poison, a soul-devouring Demon." Wow, so we only got one uninterrupted day with a soul? LAME!

0:02 A flying beast casts a huge shadow over land. A choir chants over timpani and trumpets as a lone armored hero takes out a bunch of shambling, possibly undead soldiers in slow-mo. He gets knocked back and rises to face a skeleton holding a huge scimitar. Organ music as a glowing ghost shoots an arrow at the skeleton. A giant dragon-ish beast rises up in the middle distance and roars. Fade to white as the choir fades out. Yeah ... that intro did nothing to convince me this isn't the same hack-and-slash crap I've played a million times.

0:05 The game can't connect to the Demon's Souls server, possibly because it's a trade demo and not a retail copy. Looks like I'm going it alone...

0:07 Time to "Create Profile." I name my character "?!," because I can. I can be a Soldier, Knight, Hunter, Priest, Magician, Wanderer, Barbarian, Thief, Temple Knight or Royalty. That's a lot of choices! I think I'll go with Royalty, just because it's so different. And regal!

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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The Saboteur

Developer: Pandemic Studios
Publisher: EA
Release Date: Dec. 8, 2009
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360, PC
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Grand Theft WWII-era Paris

0:00 I've been interested in this game since I first heard about it back in 1995. Seriously, I feel like I've been waiting for this stylish period piece forever, and now it's finally here just in time for the studio that worked so hard on it to shut down. This is all coloring my perceptions going in.

0:01 A red fleur-de-lis shimmers in the light a bit, then the game tells me I need "1021 MB more free space on the hard drive." It's always something with these PS3 releases...

0:02 The Bourne Conspiracy is taking up 4.68 GB on my hard drive? Good lord, why?

0:03 "The Saboteur needs to perform an initial setup process. This will take about 7 minutes." Well I appreciate their warning me, at least. Let's see how accurate their estimate is...

0:10 The install is done ... almost exactly seven minutes after it started. That's pretty impressive.

0:11 Logos, then a painted red line morphs into a woman's tight-pantsed backside. The line shifts goes down to the title. Fade to a black-and-white Parisian skyline, focused on the Eiffel Tower. Faint sirens in the background. Cut to an old car rumbling down a cobblestone street. There are red lights on some signs, but everything else has a noir-ish grayscale palette. I love the sensuous old French accordion music in the background.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Dragon Age: Origins

Developer: Bioware Edmonton
Publisher: EA
Release Date: Nov. 3, 2009
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360, PC
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web Site

In a nutshell: The Early Education of a Magical Bear

0:00 I've been putting off loading up my copy of this one because I'm not generally a big fan of sword-and-sorcery RPGs, even if they're by the vaunted BioWare. Plus I was underwhelmed by what I felt was a boring eyes-on demo of this one at E3.

0:01 Overwrought fantasy music on the preview screen, along with a hooded lady shown in a crimson dragon emblem. Meh.

0:02 The bad news: The game requires new firmware to be played. The good news: The firmware seems to be on the disc, and doesn't require a lengthy download. The data is copied to the hard drive in a matter of seconds, but the actual install process crawls along slower than expected. I'll letcha know when it's done.

0:06 That was relatively painless. I spent the four-minute install playing some SkiFree on my laptop. Now THERE'S a fun game.

0:07 "There is not enough available space in the HDD. To create data, at least 901 MB more space is required." Of course it is...

0:08 So long, Haze game data. Your 3.866 gigs will be put to much better use in the future.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Brutal Legend

Developer: Double Fine
Publisher: Electronic Arts
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360
Release Date: Oct. 13, 2009
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web Site

In a nutshell: So metal, it's funny.

0:00 I'm a big fan of Jack Black and Tim Schafer, but not a big fan of heavy metal music. Not even in an ironic, detached way. I just really don't like it. Also, I could barely hear the demo I saw with Gus Mastrapa on the crowded E3 show floor this year. So, I really don't know what to expect from this.

0:01 Before the game even starts, I'm treated to this hilarious sequence of Jack Black one-liners on the PS3 preview screen: "Let's mosh it up! Whaddaya say? ... Time for a mosh pit! ... Come on, dude, how come we're not moshing? ... Yep, moshing time! ... If only we had a mosh pit going on ... Yep, a mosh pit would really hit the spot right about now. ... One of these days, I'm gonna try that mosh-pit thing I've been hearing about. ... Pffft, yeah, mosh pits are probably stupid." I'm already laughing and the game hasn't even started!

0:02 "Version 1.01 of the software is already available." And it's ... a 256 MB download?! Say what you will about the PS3, it is predictable. Oh well. The system estimates I'll be seeing you in 13 minutes...

0:16 I love how the counter says "108 seconds" rather than rounding to two minutes. As if that makes the 15-minute wait so far less interminable.

0:18 Download finally done ... another minute to install, and...

0:19 "There is not enough free space on the hard disk. The game was forced to quit. At least 170 MB more free space is needed." Kill me now.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Uncharted 2: Among Thieves

Developer: Naughty Dog
Publisher: Sony
Release Date: Oct. 13, 2009
System: PS3
ESRB Rating: T
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Ow! I got snow in my festering chest wound. Look out!

0:00 I enjoyed the writing and presentation in the first Uncharted, but stopped when the game started throwing endless streams of ridiculously tough enemies at me. After reading a bunch of reviews that call this sequel the greatest game of its generation, the bar is set mighty high. Will it live up to expectations? We shall see...

0:01 After a good minutes of loading and logos we've reached ... the title screen. Really? That's why you needed all that loading? Anyway, birds fly around amidst golden idols in a sun-lit jungle tomb. Timpani-heavy, John Williams-esque music sets the mood.

0:02 Difficulties are Very Easy, Easy, Normal and Hard. Where's my Very Hard? I DEMAND SYMMETRICAL DIFFICULTIES. Oh, maybe it's locked. Well ... all right, then ... Normal it is.

0:03 There's an option for "Motion Sensor Throw." OFF PLEASE!

0:04 This is the first game I can recall that lets me set the "dynamic range" on the audio. I don't even know what that means, but it can be set to Maximum, Wide, Normal, Narrow or Midnight. That last one sounds cool. Let's go with that.

0:05 Twitter! Yes, the game can update your Twitter account as you play. A few of my Twitter friends had this on, pestering my feed with endless updates on their progress through the chapters. I think I'll pass. I actually like my Twitter friends.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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SingStar Vol. 2

Developer: SCE London Studios
Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment
Release Date: May 20, 2008
System: PS3
ESRB Rating: T
Official Web site

In a nutshell: I love to sing-ah. About the moon-ah and the June-ah and the spring-ah.

one of those days for me. I doubt it'll be much different than the first PS3 SingStar volume I reviewed, but at least the songs will be fresher.

0:09 These first minutes were spent digging through my closet, looking for my SingStar microphones and EyeToy PS3 camera. I know this isn't the game's fault, but it's true, so I'll include it in the count.

0:10 A 55 MB update to "version 4.10" is available, apparently. The only listed upgrade is "Polish is now a language option," but on the off chance there's something else important, let's download it.

0:15 During the initial loading, the game zooms in on specific buttons on a 3-D model of the controller, describing what each one does in about 50 bazillion languages. Then a Latina and what looks like her grandmother sing along to Queen's "Don't Stop Me Now". The sing-along video cuts to young sisters in red polka dots, a blonde girl in pigtails, a teen with her grandfather, and two "rapper" types, all singing along badly but seemingly having a great time. The video eventually goes slow-mo, showing their hair flying everywhere as they gyrate. At the end, the video gets four stars from an unseen rater, and zooms out to reveal a video mosaic making the SingStar logo. Captures the feeling of the game pretty well.

0:19 Scanning the song list. There's a few decent ones, but mostly I'm surprised by the sheer number of songs I don' recognize. I guess I'm getting old ... ooh, "California Dreamin'"! Done!

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Batman: Arkham Asylum

Developer: RockSteady Studios
Publisher: Eidos/ Warner Bros. Interactive
Release Date: Aug. 25, 2009
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360, PC
ESRB Rating: T
Official Web site

In a nutshell: A rare gaming bright spot for the Dark Knight.

0:00 Despite the absolutely enormous amounts of hype for this one, I've been trying to tamp down my expectations -- it is a superhero game, after all, and they almost invariably suck. I even ignored the demo so I could go into the full game fresh. So ... here we go!

0:01 Right off, I like how the preview screen puts an old-fashioned TV around the tiny video of Batman kicking and punching a bunch of bad guys.

0:02 "There is not enough free space on the hard disk. At least 486 MB more free space is needed." Of course it is...

0:03 So long, NPPL Pro Paintball install data. You will not be missed terribly much.

0:04 "For optimal performance, 2286 more MB of HDD space is needed. You may continue playing, or quit now to free up space." First off, why are you just telling me this now? Second off, hell yeah I want the optimal experience!

0:05 So long, MLB 09: The Show install data. You were incredibly huge and pointless.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Tom Clancy's H.A.W.X.

Developer: Ubisoft Romania
Publisher: Ubisoft
Release Date: March 6, 2009
Systems: PS3 (reveiwed), Xbox 360, PC
ESRB Rating: T
Offical Web site

In a nutshell: Hey, it takes a long time to install flight-sim action this good!

0:00 I'm not a big fan of Tom Clancy games, almost on general principle. I do like action-packed dogflight games, though, and this one got some good buzz when it came out, so it's definitely worth a try.

0:01 A 41 MB update is available and currently downloading. Only 98 seconds left as I type this ... not too shabby.

0:03 A quick install and we're good to go yet again. Or so I THOUGHT! In reality, I need to free up an additional 2197 MB of install space before we continue. ARGH!

0:04 So long, Linger in Shadows. I promise to re-download you if I want some weird-ass demoscene stuff.

0:06 I barely even recall installing NBA 09: The Inside, but I'll gladly reclaim the 2+ gigs of install space it's taking up.

0:07 "Please wait while Installing Game Data. Do not switch off the system." One, this is very polite of the PS3 to phrase this way. Two, I love how "Install Game Data" is capitalized. Like it's a trademark or something.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Fat Princess

Developer: Titan Studios
Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment
Release Date: July 30, 2009
System: PS3
ESRB Rating: T
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Castle Crashers + StarCraft + CAKE!

0:00 Most of my knowledge of this game comes from the feminist controversy surrounding its concept. And since controversial = good, I'm looking forward to it!

0:01 A light medieval melody plays as tiny, cute, cel-shaded characters run around a castle, picking up cake and such. In the corner, a fat princess sits munching on a sign that says "Start." Yum!

0:02 The options menu is called "Twiddly Knobs." From that I can tell that this is gonna be my kind of game. I "Get Fabulous" by randomizing my character's look a few times. He ends up with pale white skin and a spiky black beard and hair.

0:03 There are 18 pages of "how to play" text with simple picture tutorials. I'm guessing the actual game has a better tutorial, so I'll save this for later.

0:04 I'm definitely not ready to "Play with Others," so I guess I'll just "Play With [Myself]." Wait ... that didn't sound right...

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Rag Doll Kung Fu: Fists of Plastic

Developer: Tarsier Studios
Publisher: Sony Computer Entertainment
Release Date: April 9, 2009
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), PC
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Super Smash Bros. meets LittleBigPlanet meets "Robot Chicken."

0:00 The mounds of hype around this indie PC release wasn't enough to get me to even try the demo, but they release a free downloadable version on PSN and I'm there. Go fig.

0:01 "Installing trophies." Really? You have to install the Trophies? What does that even mean? "Creating Save Game," OK. "Adjust Screen Size," done. "Sony Computer Entertainment Presents" ... Havok logo ... Epilepsy Warning ... come ON, I want to PLAY!

0:02 An extremely yellow title screen, with action figures in action poses. There's an Afro Samurai-looking dude, a wizened, white-haired, stereotypical kung-fu master, and a Bruce Lee-alike. Let's jump into the tutorial.

0:03 "Master Tang is a loner," says the loading screen. "The Kung Fu community respects his desire for solitude because he reeks of fish..." Heh.

0:04 Just two attack buttons -- a punch and a kick -- but I can point them in any direction with the left analog stick. A bit odd, since the stick also controls movement, but it works. I love the hilariously jerky movements of the action figure characters -- like marionettes being jerked violently about. The floaty jumping reminds me more than a little bit of Super Smash Bros.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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Burn Zombie Burn

Developer: doublesix
Publisher: doublesix
Release Date: March 26, 2009
System: PS3
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Smash TV meets Zombies Ate My Neighbors

0:00 I watched a demo of this game for about five minutes at the latest Game Developers Conference. Looked fun enough, but it's hard to gauge until I get my hands on that controller.

0:01 Eerie zither music gives way to a driving guitar beat on the simple title screen. In the background, sepia-toned zombies wander about a yard aimlessly.

0:02 I got a decently broad idea of the game at GDC, but I have no idea of the particulars, so let's jump into the tutorial. "Welcome to Zombie Academy! Day 1 - Basics."

0:04 A Bruce Campbell lookalike in a flaming bowling shirt appears in a virtual environment right out of "The Matrix." He teases his ridiculous pompadour and pulls out a pistol. From a mostly overhead view I get some nice responsive running by tilting the left stick. Tapping the fire button gives faster shots than just holding it down -- that's gonna get annoying. Clicking the left stick brings up pointers to nearby weapons -- nice touch.

0:06 I pick up a chainsaw and tear through 25 zombies in record time. A few of them manage to grab at me when I get close. The characters are so tiny it's hard to discern whether I'm hitting them with the chainsaw or with ME.

***-->CONTINUE READING AT CRISPY GAMER<--***

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