Monday, March 30, 2009

Afro Samurai

Publisher: Namco/Bandai
Developer: Surge
Release Date: Jan. 27, 2009
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: An Afro makes everything more stylish ... even beat-'em-ups.

0:00 I think Gus Mastrapa told me that this ridiculous-sounding game is actually surprisingly good, so it's his ass on the line if it ends up being as stupid as I think it will.

0:01 It wouldn't be a PS3 game if I didn't have to install some ridiculous update on the first play. Luckily it's only a 13 MB download, which shouldn't take long. Hey, do you remember when a 13 MB download would take a long time on a dial-up modem? Ah, memories.

0:02 And we're off. "The stories that surround the two sacred headbands are as numerous as those who have died in their pursuit." The narrator (voiced recognizably by Samuel L. Jackson) doesn't know about "any of that bullshit," but he's seen the pain that the quest for the headbands has caused our titular samurai. On screen, black calligraphy brushstrokes sprout into a forest of trees, which get slashed by an unseen sword, sending spurts of bright red blood spattering everywhere. Gentle hip-hop beats play as the title appears.

0:05 As I enter the options screen, Jackson yells at me: "Lookin' for options? You got none left, boy! Ahahahahahaha!" That's a little ... hostile for a simple options screen, don'tcha think?

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Personal Trainer: Math

Developer: Nintendo
Publisher: Nintendo
Release Date: Jan. 12, 2009
System: Nintendo DS
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Also known as "Make Kyle Feel Bad About His Division Skills: The Game!"

0:00 Doing math drills doesn't sound like much fun to me, but Nintendo sent me the game so I figure I owe it to them to at least try it out. I'm a bit afraid to see how much my math skills have atrophied since my school days. Hopefully this isn't calculus-level stuff.

0:01 I hold the DS on its side, book-style. "Welcome to Personal Trainer: Math!" says a blue-haired guy in a blue suit. He has no mouth, yet he somehow says: "My name is Hideo Kageyama. I'm going to be your new math teacher." Hey-o, Hideo.

0:03 The game recommends starting with the Daily Test, and who am I to argue? "Oh, I see that this is your first-ever daily test. It's important that you practice math every day." Hence the "daily" part of "daily test," right?

0:04 The first test is a series of flash cards. I have to count how many items appear on a flash card and write the number on the touch-screen. Really, that's it. This doesn't feel like "math" to me. Feels more like "counting." Counting is not math! My time of 31 seconds got me second place by only a second, mainly because I had to correct the faulty text recognition a couple of times.

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Pokémon Platinum Version

Developer: Nintendo
Publisher: Nintendo
Release Date: March 22, 2009
System: Nintendo DS
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Really? I've gotta catch 'em all? Again? Oh man...

0:00 It's appropriate that this game is named after a precious metal, since the last true Pokémon game I played was named after a precious gem (Emerald). Right? Appropriate!

0:01 The Pokémon logo appears with all the subtlety of a freight train on the top screen. On the bottom screen, a vignette of overhead shots of simple 3-D towns. Then two trainers run on both screens, one boy and one girl. Manga-style action as they throw Pokéballs to release ... a bunch of Pokémon I don't recognize. Who are all these guys? Then an evil-looking guy with evil-sounding music, red eyes peering from a dark void above a smiling red mouth. The title appears on the top screen while a floating yellow and red form shows on the bottom.

0:03 "Hello there! It's so very nice to meet you!" says a faceless voice. "Welcome to the world of Pokémon!" It's Rowan, a guy in a blue vest with white hair and a bushy mustaches. Everyone calls him the professor.

0:04 "You are about to enter a world where you will embark on a grand adventure of your very own." Imagine that ... adventure in a videogame!

0:05 "On your travels, we hope that you will meet countless people and, through them, achieve personal growth. This is the most important objective of this adventure." This is so sickeningly sweet I think I'm getting diabetes.

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Tuesday, March 24, 2009


Developer: HandCircus
Publisher: ngmoco
Release Date: Dec. 18, 2008
System: iPhone/iPod Touch
ESRB Rating: N/A
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Like LocoRoco if it were actually fun to play instead of just cute.

0:00 Now that I've finally joined the rest of the developed world in the iPhone revolution (by buying an iPod Touch), I thought I'd check out what is widely considered one of the best examples of what iPhone gaming is capable of.

0:01 Already I'm impressed with how easy and quick it is to purchase and download games wirelessly through the App Store. Compared to the pain that is the PSP's online store, it's a wonder.

0:02 "Hey Finger, let's get started," says a roly-poly red ball with a blinking face on the menu screen. As I tilt the iPod he rolls along the edge. Very cute, very reminiscent of LocoRoco. I'm digging the samba music.

0:03 A pop-up book opens to reveal a map and the first level, "Hello Rolando." What is this, a Motorola commercial?

0:04 "Hey Finger! Give me a tap!" I do and Rolando gets a thick white border around him, allowing him to roll as I tilt the iPhone. I don't think I like him calling me "Finger" though.

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Friday, March 20, 2009

MLB Dugout Heroes

Developer: NeoWiz
Publisher: GamesCampus
Release Date: 3/19/08 (Beta)
System: PC
ESRB Rating: N/A
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Buggy beta baseball.

0:00 The last PC baseball game I played was Hardball 3 back in the mid-'90s. I'd play it with my dad and get annoyed when he let the computer handle all the hitting and fielding work. All he wanted to do was manage the team. Da-aaaaaaad!

0:01 I'm not counting the hour and a half or so it took to download the 385 MB client for the closed beta from the GamesCampus FTP server, but I will count the minute or so it took to install. SO THERE!

0:02 "Your client is old. Please download the latest version of the game client." I hadn't anticipated this. I just downloaded the client yesterday evening! There's no link for the new client, so a-hunting I will go.

0:04 Oh, apparently the official open beta will be starting later today, so instead of re-download the closed beta, I decide to play a different game and move on to a new game for today's lunch. See ya tomorrow!

*A day passes*

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Everyday Shooter

Developer: Queasy Games
Publisher: SCEA
Release Date: Oct. 11, 2007
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), PSP, PC
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: What if Geometry Wars were even MORE abstract...
0:00 Despite absolutely loving a five-minute demo of this game at E3 '07, I somehow never managed to actually buy it or even request a press copy. That situation ends NOW!

0:01 A pleasantly small 38 MB download and quick install. All PSN games should be this painless to access!

0:02 "Everyday Shooter: A Queasy Game by Jonathan Mak." There's some utterly simple and charming acoustic guitar plunking in the background of the nice, basic menu screen.

0:04 First, some notes: "In the spring of 2005 I started work on what I called 'the new game,'" Mak writes. It was self-indulgent and "games-as-art-theory-innovation wankery," apparently. Then he went back to his roots: the top-down shoot-'em-up! Yes!

0:05 OK, let's do this. Options are Normal Play and Single Play. I'm married, so I guess Hetero-Normative play is for me. Eh? Eh? *crickets chirping*

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Wednesday, March 18, 2009


Developer: Spark Unlimited
Publisher: Gamecock
Release Date: Nov. 4, 2008
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), Xbox 360, PC
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Well, what do you know ... we reached the end of the world and the only monster here is me -- lovable, furry old magma monster....

0:00 My exposure to this game has mostly had to do with making fun of its ridiculous original name, Legendary: The Box. Still, that was enough to get the game on my radar, so maybe it wasn't such an awful name after all...

0:01 "Installing required game data. Please do not turn off the PlayStation 3 system." In the time it took me to type that, it's already up to 13 percent, so maybe this won't be so bad...

0:03 We're up to 33 percent, but I'm not focusing on that. I'm taking stock in all the beauty in the world around me. The gentle tweeting of the first spring birds. The light through the window as it gently falls on the dust in the air. Ah ... so tranquil...

0:06 53 percent now. It actually seems to be slowing down. But I'm not focusing on that ... I'm sitting in a yoga pose, meditating on the transcendence of life and the oneness of all existence. Ommmm. Ommmm.

0:09 86 percent now. I'm calm ... I'm peaceful, I ... JUST WANT TO PLAY THIS FREAKING GAME ALREADY ARGH WHY WON'T YOU INSTALL FASTER GO GO GO GO GO!!!!!!!

0:11 I wake up amidst a pile of broken living room furniture to find the install is done. Well, that was relatively painless, wasn't it?

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Linger in Shadows

Developer: Plastic
Publisher: SCEA
Release Date: Oct. 9, 2008
System: PS3
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: The PS3 goes to art school and gets all pretentious on us.

0:00 While cleaning out my email I stumbled upon a months-old download code for this piece of self-described "interactive art." It might be unfair to expect a whole hour of interesting content from something like this, but they are charging money for it, so I don't think it's that much to ask.

0:01 The title screen appears after a decently long bit of loading, only there's no title, just a close-up of some sort of stone robot with undulating wires flitting about. Reminds me a bit of Shadow of the Colossus. I love the deeply resonant string music in the background.

0:02 My menu choices are "Linger," "Watch" and "Linger in Shadows and demoscene." Er, let's try Linger, I guess.

0:03 We start with a shot of an orange sky, which slowly pans down to fluffy white clouds. As the camera falls through a hole in the clouds we see painted images of what I assume is the development team, along with their names in stylized text. The ethereal music helps set the mood.

0:04 Once we get through the clouds, everything fades to black. Then the scene quickly rewinds, complete with VHS-style sounds and image distortion, back to a scene with a picture of a woman and some silver orbs hovering around a shiny cylinder. Leaning the controller to one side or the other rotates the orbs around their cylindrical axis. Shaking the controller, meanwhile, distorts the entire scene and threatens to undo reality itself. It looks like something's trying to break out of the TV!

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Monday, March 16, 2009

Hinterlands: Orc Lords

Developer: Tilted Mill Entertainment
Publisher: Got Game entertainment
Release Date: Sept. 20, 2008
System: PC
ESRB Rating: N/A
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Equal parts city-building, action-RPG adventuring and frustration.
0:00 When Got Game e-mailed me asking if I wanted to try out a press copy of this action-RPG expansion pack, I said yes. And now you know just as much about the game as I do (or possibly more, if you've played the game or something).

0:01 A vaguely Celtic jig plays over a menu screen featuring two backpacked hikers trekking into the forest from a pastoral medieval town. Very nice art style here.

0:02 I can choose from six females or five males, each represented by a classy painted portrait. I go for a blonde, short-haired girl with a red blouse because that's how I'm feeling today. DON'T JUDGE ME!

0:03 Oh, it seems I can also choose from a bunch of "character backgrounds," including a few that are dwarves, elves, goblins and orcs. They all have their own portraits, of course. I stick with a nice human Seneschal because I like the way it sounds. Say it with me now. Seneschaaaaaal.

0:04 Difficulties are Easy, Medium, Difficult and Hardcore. I can also choose a game length of Short, Medium or Long ... a rather unique touch, I think. I go with "Short," since I am just planning to play for an hour at the moment.

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Friday, March 13, 2009

Resident Evil 5

Developer: Capcom
Publisher: Capcom
Release Date: March 10, 2009
Systems: Xbox 360 (reviewed), PS3
ESRB Rating: M
Official Web site

In a nutshell: A little less survival horror, a little more action.

0:00 I can't say I was enamored with the co-op demo I played with Kotaku's Michael McWhertor at this year's CES. I think Left 4 Dead has spoiled slow, shambling zombies for me forever. We'll see if I can get over it for an hour at least...

0:01 A quick downloadable update and some animated logos and we're ready to go. A microscopic view of a bunch of black-and-white cells splitting zooms out to become the Resident Evil 5 logo. "Resident Evil ... FIVE," says a creepy voice, predictably.

0:03 Is it me, or does this seem like the kind of game that shouldn't have a "Leaderboards" option on the main menu...

0:04 I know this game is really best played cooperatively, but no one is around and the only friend I have online is playing Halo 3 and doesn't seem eager to stop.

0:05 Available difficulties are Amateur, "A mode for those who enjoy the journey"; Normal, "A mode for those who find reward through slight struggles"; and Veteran, "A mode for those who believe challenge breeds excellence." I'm somewhere in between the first two, so I err on the side of Normal.

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Thursday, March 12, 2009


Developer: Blurst
Publisher: Blurst
Release Date: March 2, 2009
System: PC
ESRB Rating: N/A
Official Web site

In a nutshell: The first stage of Spore, minus the evolution and plus a time limit.

0:00 I enjoyed the developer's previous Off-Road Velociraptor Safari and Minotaur China Shop, but found they didn't have much staying power. Been hearing good stuff about this one, though, so looking forward to trying it out.

0:01 This minute spent downloading and installing the "Unity Web Player," which I was relatively sure I already had. I guess I played the others on my laptop...

0:02 I'm all logged in and confronted with a tranquil underwater scene, complete with transparent mushrooms resting on rocks and ethereal, Auditorium-style music.

0:03 I click "Play" and a purple jellyfish appears in the middle of the water. Clicking anywhere on the screen makes him swim towards the pointer with his spindly tentacles. Oh, shoot, I just noticed there's a time limit ticking down in the corner and I can't figure out how to pause. I'll be back in roughly 3:13.

0:07 Time's up. The game is all about attacking the other cephalopods by spinning my body and whipping my tentacles at them. Then I have to pick up the eggs they drop and drop them off at glowing white "collection points," which I have the darndest time finding, actually. Near the end of my time I'm pursued by a giant, transparent blue hydra, who manages to bite off a bunch of my tentacles. This is followed by the most "No duh" pop-up tip I've ever seen: "Enemies can hurt you." My performance gets me 68,300 points and #28,322 on the leaderboards.

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Mushroom Men: The Spore Wars

Developer: Red Fly Studios
Publisher: Gamecock
Release Date: Dec. 2, 2008
Systems: Wii (Reviewed), DS
ESRB Rating: E10+
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Not the best platform game to feature mushrooms, but possibly the best to feature a mushroom protagonist.
0:00 It's not very hard to get me to try a new 3-D platformer, and this one had enough low-level buzz to put it high up on my list of vague interest.

0:01 The preview screen has some odd drum beats and a bunch of glowing eyes looking out from the blackness behind some tall grass. I'm already hooked!

0:02 After a bunch of animated logos, a bare title screen features some multicolored glow bugs on the walls of a cavern. Story time: "From the depths of space, a giant meteor hurtles towards planet Earth." It lands and casts green dust across the countryside. "Conventional science says it has no effect on terrestrial life: But science ... was wrong!" SCIENCE! *shakes fist*

0:04 Hidden amongst the gameplay options are a bunch of mini-games. I decide to use them to ease into the experience a bit. "Pachinko" is like a poor man's Peggle, with a percentage counter that goes up as the small ball hits metal pegs on the way down to a few point buckets. Cute, but I don't think it has any real staying power.

0:08 "Catapult" features some overly touchy slingshot pull-back controls to attack some ambulatory mushrooms. A "mine cart" game reminds me of Pipe Dream, in a good way. The others are just cheapo versions of Memory and Peg Solitaire, so I don't even bother. These were good little appetizers all around. Has me excited for the main game.

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Calvin Tucker's Redneck Jamboree

Developer: Zoo Games
Publisher: Zoo Games
Release Date: Nov. 17, 2008
System: Wii
ESRB Rating: E-10+
Official Web site

In a nutshell: A hate crime against rednecks AND gamers at the same time!

0:00 With a title that stupid, there was no way I could resist adding this to my GameFly queue. It's the same compulsion that makes me stare at accidents on the side of the highway. What can I say ... I am an awful person.

0:01 After I insert the disc in the system, the Disc Channel shows a small two-frame animation. Frame No. 1: An overall-clad guy in a trucker cap holds out a flower. Frame No. 2: A cow tittering with her hand over her mouth and a heart over her head. Oh man, this game is going to be exquisitely awful.

0:02 "How many Rednecks does it take to eat a possum? Two ... one to eat it and one to watch for cars." This is what passes for a joke on the initial loading screen.

0:04 This may be the first game I've ever played that has an option to enable or disable a "Cow lottery event." Someone contact Guinness!

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Monday, March 9, 2009

New Play Control! Pikmin

Developer: Nintendo
Publisher: Nintendo
Release Date: March 9, 2009
System: Wii
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Pikmin ... now with new play control. DUH!

0:00 This is kind of a unique situation for Games for Lunch, since I already played (and loved) the original Pikmin on the GameCube for many more than a few hours. Still, Nintendo sent me this new, control-tweaked Wii remake, so I guess it's worth an hour to see how the new play controls work. It'll also be interesting to see if the game still holds up roughly ... seven years later? Man I'm old.

0:01 The preview screen is an endearing loop of three Pikmin getting thrown from off-screen, picking up the game logo, then making surprised noises. I want this to be the new screen saver on my computer.

0:02 Wow, everything looks really grainy. Were these really state-of-the-art graphics back in 2001? Maybe my HDTV just doesn't do standard definition very well...

0:03 Olimar's familiar bottle rocket flies through space, gets hit by an asteroid, and hurtles down to the planet as a fireball, complete with cheesy music and sound effects. "The Impact Site" is just as cute as ever.

0:04 "My name is Captain Olimar. While travelling through space I was struck by a meteor..." Blah blah blah ... I just said all this back at 0:03.

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Friday, March 6, 2009

MLB 09: The Show

Developer: SCEA
Publisher: SCEA
Release Date: March 3, 2009
Systems: PS3 (reviewed), PS2, PSP
ESRB Rating: E
Official Web site

In a nutshell: A realistic bit of spring on a cold winter's day

0:00 Apparently I didn't like MLB 07 but did like MLB 08 when I played them for an hour. This could be because of the many (read: few) differences between the versions, but more likely relates to my mood at the time of playing.

0:01 The intro video has a "then & now" theme. "He anchors the front of the rotation. He's an All-Star. A Hall-of-Famer. He's the guy you count on to start the season, to stop a losing streak, to start a post-season series. They deliver the strikeouts, they deliver the wins, and most of all, they deliver the glory." He's ... the pitcher, I guess? "THE TRADITION CONTINUES!" the screen blares. Title screen! OK then!

0:02 "The game requires data to be cached to the HDD. This process will take 6-7 minutes." Of course it does...

0:04 Just as a warning: It's roughly 5 degrees Kelvin outside in Pittsburgh today, so I'm not really in the mood for baseball...

0:06 During the HDD preloading process I get to stare at an HD image of some screaming Red Sox player. If I were a better baseball fan I'd probably know who he is...

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Thursday, March 5, 2009


Developer: Zaratustra Productions
Publisher: Zaratustra Productions
Release Date: November 2008
System: PC
ESRB Rating: N/A
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Oh, what a cute ga--OH MY GOD WHAT THE HELL?!

0:00 I first got turned on to this game by a Dinosaur Comics blog post which called it "really good!" and "entirely charming!" On the official Web page, I saw the author of VG Cats thought it was "deceptively awesome." So the authors of TWO Web comics that I read liked it? That's enough for me!

0:01 During the 8 MB download, I read the instructions for the game from the official Web site: "Left and Right - Walk. Z - Jump. X - Everse (in certain areas) ... Discover the rest as the game progresses." Intriguing! But what does "Everse" mean?

0:02 The intro mentions that the game is "not indicated for children or those of nervous disposition." Did I download prescription drugs by accident?

0:03 So I'm a little, puffy, orange guy with green shoes, tottering around a 2-D Mario-style world. I have a nice, springy jump with which to dispatch smiling circular enemies. There are blocks to bash from below and blue gems to collect, too. I absolutely adore the retro music, which sounds like it was designed for the original Game Boy.

0:05 Just like that, I've already cleared the incredibly short first level. I missed four of 22 available gems on the way, apparently. I could see them, but they were out of reach. So far the "Everse" button seems to do nothing. Hmmm...

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Wednesday, March 4, 2009


Developer: Eko System
Publisher: Tecmo
Release Date: Dec. 2, 2008
System: Wii
ESRB Rating: E10+
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Yes, the title refers to spraying vomit.
0:00 I must have been in a drunken fugue state when I added this game to my GameFly queue, because I don't remember requesting it even a little bit. It must have interested me at some point, though.

0:01 After some copious loading, a yellow title appears in front of a medieval town with windmills. Is there some regulation that all medieval towns must have windmills?

0:02 "Today is the first day of Summer in the land of Ecoia." They worship the Crystal Sun and its "benevolent energy." Everyone's gathered in the town square, waiting for the king in a cute hand-drawn cut scene. Then some clouds gather and a huge, black figure appears in the sky. "You insignificant scum ... you shall be my slaves, I shall reign over your world, hahahaha." A big rock shoots down to the ground, knocking over the King. "Father! Father!" cries what I assume is the Prince. The King gives young Ray his crown and urges him to find the crystal shards. Then the King disappears in a puff of light. When the crown alights on Ray's head, angel and devil sprites appear over his shoulders. They're gonna accompany me, apparently.

0:04 Cut to the 3-D graphics now ... the kingdom is infested with black goo, and flying black demons are swooping down to take citizens. One picks me up, but the devil on my shoulder scares him off with a roar. That a boy, devil!

0:06 "Ray! Join me, I'm waiting in the underground passage. Hurry!" cries the King. Wait, isn't he dead? And how can I hear him if he's in an underground passage?

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

The You Testament

Developer: Mat Dickie
Publisher: MDickie
Release Date: Dec. 5, 2008
System: PC
ESRB Rating: N/A
Official Web site

In a nutshell: Take the Bible and replace all the words with computer models of people punching each other...

0:00 I can't remember who first sent me the link to this game, but the idea of being a witness to the times of Jesus is just sacrilegious enough to be intriguing to me.

0:01 "I hear and I forget, I see and I remember, I do and I understand," reads an opening quote, from Confucius. Odd that the game would start with an Eastern philosopher, but I can see how it would apply to a game like this. The music is straight out of the early-'90s SoundBlaster scene. Lots of loading right up front.

0:03 Looking over the controls now. There's an attack key? In a game about the gospel of Jesus? Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that missing the point a bit? Oh, there's also a "meditate" key, so I guess that makes it all OK.

0:04 I start a new game with random characters. I am Emma, a 50-year-old civilian from Sharon with an Angry demeanor. She's wearing a green tunic and has tan skin, a small chest and a Mohawk ponytail that's quite fashion-forward for the world of 2,000 years ago.

0:05 This minute spent loading the game world extremely slowly.

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer

Monday, March 2, 2009

Secret Agent Clank

Developer: High Impact Games
Publisher: SCEA
Release Date: June 17, 2008
System: PSP
ESRB Rating: E-10+
Official Web site

In a nutshell: The game most likely to get Johnny Rivers' "Secret Agent Man" stuck in my head.

0:00 I've liked pretty much every Ratchet and Clank game so far, including the the other one on the PSP. Still, I hope this one deviates from the formula a little bit.

0:01 Tiny robot Clank stands on the street in a tuxedo and sunglasses, reading a newspaper. He occasionally looks up, like he's expecting trouble. I press start and the scene changes to a static menu with a picture of Clank. So what was the point of that newspaper scene?

0:02 A ship flies through the bluish-blackness of space, no doubt to hide the loading time. The Boltaire Museum is the destination, on a purple-ringed planet. Cut to the roof of a building; Clank lowers himself down through a skylight on a tether. An automatic glass cutter makes a circular entrance to the museum proper. Clank spies furry, orange Ratchet in a brown robe. The Lombax gets caught by a laser grid and apprehended by the guards. "Greetings, Agent Clank; were you able to protect the Eye of Infinity?" asks a robot on the ship's viewscreen. No such luck. Cut to a news report that shows Ratchet being taken away in a paddy wagon. He's raving to the cameras in a crazy voice about how he's hidden the Eye of Infinity where no one will find it. A retinal match shows it's actually Ratchet, but Clank doesn't believe it. I don't either...

0:05 Clank jumps out of the ship and is off to look for clues to the Eye's whereabouts. Running around with the analog stick, I stumble into a search beam, sending robotic dogs out to bite at me. A few punches bring 'em down.

0:08 The controls are decent but not great so far ... I don't like how the camera needs constant taps of R and L to stay behind Clank. I also don't like Clank's lack of a double jump. I do like his fluid punch/kick combos when I jam on the attack button.

Read the full review at Crispy Gamer